Signs You're an Empath (and What to Do About It)
Have you ever had dinner with a friend who leaves saying they feel so much better, and you go home needing a nap? I hear some version of that story almost every week. A lot of people call themselves empaths. A lot more are empaths and just don’t have a word for it yet.
An empath is someone who naturally feels other people’s energy and emotions, often right in their own body. In the psychic world, that ability is called clairsentience, or clear feeling. It’s the skill we most associate with empaths, and it’s a real one. It’s also something you can learn to work with, so it stops running your life.
Six Signs You’re an Empath
1. People leave feeling great, and you feel wiped out
You listened, you cared, and somewhere in there you took on what they were carrying. They walk away lighter. You walk away tired, and you can’t figure out why a nice lunch took so much out of you. Here’s the thing: it’s not you. You’re just that good of a healer.
2. Your mood changes when you walk into a room
You felt fine in the car. Ten minutes into the party, you’re irritated or sad or anxious, and nothing actually happened. It’s amazing how often we assume a feeling is ours when it isn’t. Empaths pick up the emotional weather of a room before anyone says a word.
3. You can’t stand seeing someone in pain
Natural healers feel other people’s pain and want to make it better, so they take it on. Maybe you’re the friend everyone calls, the one who holds the family together, or the one who always notices who’s having a hard day. Many people spend their lives healing others this way without realizing it.
4. Crowds and family gatherings wear you out
Concerts, holidays, a busy office. You might love the people and still need two days to recover. That’s not a flaw. It’s a lot of energy coming at you, and nobody taught you what to do with it.
5. You’ve been told you’re “too sensitive”
Maybe you’ve said it about yourself: “I’m just sensitive. Nothing can be done.” It’s just not true. Sensitivity is information. What’s missing is a way to sort what’s yours from what isn’t.
6. You’re exhausted from giving
I see a lot of people in their forties who are deeply depleted from giving their energy away for years. They’re good at taking care of everyone else. The name of the game is having your energy in you.
Why This Happens
Everything is energy. You have your own unique life force. Energy gets mixed up with other people’s energy all day long. And the most important part: you can clear it. When you’re an empath, much of what doesn’t feel good isn’t yours. It came in through your sensitivity and it never left.
Why Hiding Doesn’t Work
A lot of empath advice says to avoid people, stay home and protect yourself. It really drives me crazy, because it doesn’t address the core issue. You can’t hide from energy. Distance doesn’t stop it either. You can live across the country from a family member and still be handling their energy every day. And when you over-protect, you usually end up with more charge, not less. The answer is to tune down, not shut out.
What to Do Instead
Ask how much of it is yours
The next time a strong feeling hits, picture a dial from 0 to 100% and ask, “How much of this is mine?” Don’t think about it. Just notice the first number. I’ve been doing this work for 22 years, and I’m still surprised at how little of a given emotion is actually mine. I still pick up other people’s energy. I just recover a lot faster.
Ground yourself
Grounding connects you to the earth so you have somewhere to release what isn’t yours. In our classes, we use a grounding cord, a line of energy from the base of your spine to the center of the earth. Think of it like the grounding wire in a house. It gives the extra charge somewhere safe to go.
Fill back in with your own energy
Clearing is only half of it. If you let go of someone else’s energy and don’t fill that space with your own, something else moves right back in. Calling your energy back is what makes you feel like yourself again. If you want to try it tonight, our Reclaiming Your Energy guided meditation walks you through it.
Keep your empathy
People worry that getting centered will make them cold. It won’t. You still care. You just get to choose how much you take on, instead of reacting to everything around you. You don’t need to be the receptacle for everyone’s weight, and you’re in a much better position to help when you aren’t.
Where to Start
Being sensitive is a skill you haven’t been taught to use yet. Our Energy Essentials class is where most people start. In five weeks, live online or self-paced, you learn to ground, get centered and clear what isn’t yours, so you can be around people and still feel like you. If you already know you’re a natural healer and want to go deeper into the feeling side, our Healer Training centers on clairsentience and how to heal without taking on other people’s energy.
You don’t have to figure it all out at once. Pick one thing from this post, play with it this week and see what happens.
Quick Answers
Is being an empath a psychic ability?
Yes. Being an empath is a form of clairsentience, one of the “clairs,” or psychic senses. Everyone has some of it. Developing the skill means taking charge of it, so you’re not the effect of everyone else’s energy.
Can an empath stop absorbing other people’s energy?
You can learn to notice when you’re taking it on and clear it, usually much faster than you’d expect. Grounding, asking how much of a feeling is yours, and filling back in with your own energy are the place to start.
